Dear Diary: To Oblivion And Back It Seems ♥︎
When all else fails, what is it truly that we have to fall back on. I haven’t been able to record my thoughts recently as I’ve been so busy trying to get things in order in a way that I see fit. I feel as though I have found ways in which I am able to reach my goals without feeling like I’m losing myself in the process. Then it comes the time when we realize we’ve been putting all our efforts in the wrong places and we wonder which step, or which direction we’ll be heading in next.
Where will I be heading in next?
I woke up this morning thinking “Yes, I want to write today.” Not because I felt like I have to, not because I’m falling behind on where I want my story to be, but because I felt the urge and the will to actually sit down and continue. With just around 17,000 words I feel as though I could be doing a whole lot better and that my storyline has just begun. But, then again that’s the beauty in it all right? Especially when the storyline not only decides to screw the rules and plot and take turns and twists unimaginable to the writer until, of course, it happens. Now that’s thrilling, and that’s what it feels like when I write.
I feel as though how I had been feeling for the past few weeks, ready to wither away into oblivion and all that, was all just a dream. I can’t account for it being on my writing, my will, or my new found interests in certain areas of my life. Whichever it may be, I know that there’s much more to come, because I no longer feel like I’m losing myself. I feel as though now, I know exactly who I am, and who I’m striving to become.