“It’s a constant struggle, to keep up with all that you want to accomplish when you find yourself waking up on the wrong side of the bed. Where you feel like everything is working against you, and all you want to do is start over. I woke up this morning feeling the same, wishing it weren’t Monday. It was almost as if I had removed myself from my will to get up and get things done today. That is not a feeling I’d like to frequent. I like to be productive, I like to accomplish my goals. However, my schedule can’t always account for my bad days.”
This week has been a good one, but I know that trying to find a balance between all that I want to get done and all that I can realistically get done has proved to be difficult. Though, I can say that I am proud to be doing something. I’ve spent the last few writing sessions really trying to get a hold on where my story is heading, and so I’ve been reading through, trying to see the story from the reader’s perspective and I am happy with where it’s headed.
I can definitely say that there were many moments where I just wanted to scrap the whole thing and start over. Granted, I felt like that today. What’s important is not trying to pretend the will to quit doesn’t exist, but trying to move past it and work towards being proud of the work you’ve created. I know that I have a million other ideas that are still waiting to be written, I know that there is so much more writing I have yet to do. I rarely ever take the time to appreciate my work for what it is, rather than wishing it were better.
I keep telling myself that nothing is perfect the first time around, and my first draft is never going to be perfect. Right now, I’ve found myself at a crossroad, realizing that the options are endless, yet I still want to pick all the right ones. The ideas I feel will make the story undoubtedly a part of me. It really is amazing, how much more I push myself to get things done, when I know I’m not feeling it. Once I finish up here, I’m going to finish reading through the last two chapters of my work before I continue, and honestly
Nothing makes me happier.
Don’t allow those moments of slight doubt get to you, for it is when we push through and do something that we begin to realize that it’s not about writing to gain, it’s about writing because it brings you joy. You’re exactly where you need to be, and your work is your own. No one can take that from you.