Fresh Starts and All That I Need to Remember
“It didn’t feel the same this time. As I returned to the place I began my new life, I remembered just how I was once filled with the world of anxiety, where there was no balance in my life. Where I had no idea how to begin living it. As I sit here writing this, I’ve somehow manage to uproot that entirely. I’ve somehow managed to make room for all of the things I do love. I’ve managed to allow myself to find a routine I can stick to, and I can’t quit while I’m ahead.”
It was surreal. That moment I jumped back on a plane after eight months to continue living the life I’ve always dreamed of having. Moving has always been an experience I thought I’d enjoy, and after being back home for eight months, I realized just how ready I was to begin making a difference in my life. I remembered just how hard it had once been to stick to a schedule, to get things done, to work towards my goal. Since I’ve been here, I get up every morning wanting to do just that. I couldn’t be more thankful.
With all the time that has passed, I’ve realized just how hard I’ve been on myself to do the impossible. Not realizing that it is the little effort that makes the biggest difference.
Surely, since I’ve been back I’ve had the world of things to do, thus I’ve had little to no time to sit down and read or continue writing my novel. What have I done? I’ve made the time. I’ve had some of my best writing sessions recently, and I’m halfway into yet another book. I’ve found somewhat of a balance, where I can be proud of my decisions, and still do the things I love. That is something I couldn’t even dream of doing eight months ago. I continue to learn a lot, as I explore my writing ability, as I continue to grow. I’ve started to see what is that deserves my time, what it is that is going to make a difference in the long run. I start my second year of University in a few days, I’m gearing up to thoroughly enjoy this year, and I honestly have never been more ready for anything in my life.
So, as I continue to make a variety of changes in my life, and as I continue down the path I truly want to be on, I will watch as it affects the way I write. I want the once stressful, forced pages, to flow, feeling as free as I feel in this moment. I want my writing to reflect all that I’ve learned, and all that I’m continuing the celebrate. Celebrate the little things.
If things don’t feel like they’re going to change any time soon, make the most of it. Just because I’m not missing any of it right now, doesn’t mean that I won’t be missing at some point down the line. Enjoy what you have, sooner or later, you very well could be well on your way to achieving everything it is you want. Being here is driving me to work, being here is driving me to make a difference. I am inspired, and I am ready.
I am thankful.