“I spent quite a long time, nearing eight months at best, wondering what it would be like to return to the life I’ve built away from home. I never anticipated that I’d be as happy as I am, nor did I ever expect just how driven I would become. When you find the right environment, you realize just how much opportunity is out there, and even though there may be days where you feel as though nothing you do is good enough, you still find yourself being grateful for what it is you do have.”
In another time, I may have still been curled up in bed, refusing to tackle any of my responsibilities. However, I feel as though I’ve begun to move past all of that. I’m sick, near running a fever, and yet I’ve made it out of bed, I’ve made it to school, I’m ridiculously early to class so that I could get some studying in. These are the things I always said I would one day be able to do, and here I am, right where I belong.
When I first moved last year, I found it very difficult to cope. It was an entirely new environment, I didn’t know what to expect, I didn’t know where to begin. If my eight months have taught me anything, it’s that there will always be situations that will bring us down, especially when we’re dealing with anxiety. There will always be days when we feel like doing absolutely nothing, and I’ve found that because my drive has returned, I can thoroughly enjoy the days I do find that I need a break.
I know I haven’t had much time to continue writing, for I’m still working on balancing my school life with my creative life. Though, I’m enjoying the process, I’m enjoying learning to work with what I’ve been given, rather than against it. I’m relishing in what it feels like to finally be free of all the menial problems I’ve dealt with in the past, I finally feel like myself again.